Financial Emotional Intelligence

What The Fear of Silence Does to Our Money Beliefs


The case of the unwanted purchase

Let’s pretend it’s a warm Sunday afternoon and your life partner walks into the living room, angrily brandishing a credit card statement in their hand.

“Did you make that purchase?” they yell.

Pretending not to hear them, you ‘quietly’ keep reading your book as if they had just said nothing.

“I know you heard me,” they replied loudly. “Did-you-make-that-purchase?”

Looking guilty, you bow your head as if deeply absorbed in a fascinating anecdote in your book.

Your life partner is undeterred. They continue, “Let’s talk about this! I thought we agreed we would make all big purchases together. What on earth possessed you to buy that thing without consulting me first?”

You bite your lip, saying nothing. Your life partner stops talking and storms out of the room. Both of you can feel the icy chill in the air for days to come.

We’ve all been there … One way or the other.

What is the fear of silence?

I’ve shared this little story to better show you what the fear of silence is about.

For example …

Do you believe people who yell fear silence?

Or is it those who say nothing that fear silence?

Saying nothing and yelling can be viewed as two extremes of the same situation.

In the case of the unwanted purchase, both parties were fearing silence, and here is why:

What does befriending silence mean?


In the context of Financial Emotional Intelligence, befriending silence means that:


  • We are feeling into what money means to us emotionally. What this means is, we understand what our dominant feeling about money is, where it comes from, and how it impacts our money beliefs and our relationship with others.


  • We make it safe for others to discover how they truly feel about money and why. We suspend all judgment and choose to inquire from a place of genuine curiosity. In other words, we encourage others to dig in and identify the money beliefs that don’t work for them, and we assist them in safely letting them go.


In our example above …

Did the life partner brandishing the credit card statement understand what money meant to them emotionally and why? What makes you say that?

Did the life partner ignoring the credit card statement  understand what money means to them emotionally and why? What makes you say that?

When we positively sit in our silence, we get to feel what money means to us emotionally and why, and we get to empower others to do the same.

My name is Anne Beaulieu. I am the Financial Emotional Intelligence coach women entrepreneurs hire to build a thriving business through a carefully executed action plan. You can book a discovery call with me at

To know more about how your feeling impact money and what you can do differently to have a healthier relationship with money, I’ve got a great webinar for you: