Categories
Awareness Emotional Intelligence Self-empowerment

DIFFERENTIATING CANNOT, CANNOT, CANNOT, CANNOT

When you say the word cannot, what exactly do you mean by it? 

As a matter of fact, one of the reasons why Chinese people tend to excel in business and academics is because they are trained from a very young age to

recognize the following differences:

-> cannot (不能),

-> cannot (不会),

->cannot (不可),

-> cannot (不得).

Please allow me to explain.

When my youngest daughter was first born, her older sister, who was 4 years old at the time, immediately asked me, “Can the baby talk now?” Smiling, I answered, “No, she cannot.”

As baby Laura grew older and eventually tried to pull herself up while holding on to the living room sofa, her older sister asked me, “Can Laura walk now?” Smiling, I answered, “No, she cannot.”

Before long, Laura turned two years old. One day, her older brother walked into the kitchen while I was preparing dinner and asked, “Can Laura have a cookie now?” Smiling, I answered, “No, she cannot.”

And like all small children wanting to imitate their older siblings, Laura pestered her brother and sister to see if she could go to school with them. Because he wanted to make her happy, her older brother specifically asked me, “Can Laura go to school with me?” Smiling, I answered, “No, she cannot.”

How many times do you say the word cannot in a day? 

 

It is my belief,

 

The word cannot is misused because it is vague; it lacks precision.

In light of this,

When you say the word cannot, what exactly do you mean by it?

To clarify further, in Chinese Mandarin:

 (neng) is related to an ability to do something.
For example: “Can the baby talk now?” “No, she 不能.” (No, she no-able yet.)

不能  means that our ability to do something is not present yet.

 (hui) is related to an ability to grasp / understand in order to achieve a goal.
For example: “Can Laura walk now?” “No, she 不会.” (No, she no-learned-yet.)

不会  means that we have not mastered the ability to do something yet.

 (ke) is related to having a permission to do something.
For example: “Can Laura have a cookie now?” “No, she 不可.” (No, she no-permission yet.)

不可  means that we do not have the permission to do something yet.

得 (de) is related to having the authority to do something.
For example: “Can Laura attend class with me?” “No, she 不得.” (No, she no-officially-allowed yet.)

不得  means that we need authorities’ approval before doing something.

Keeping that in mind, when it comes to you and your dealings with the people around you:

Which cannot do you use the most every day?

Specifically, is it …

A. The one saying that our ability to do something is not present yet? 不能

B. The one saying that we not mastered the ability to do something yet? 不会

C. The one saying that we do not have the permission to do something yet? 不可

D. The one saying that we need authorities’ approval before doing something? 不得

In conclusion …

I don’t know about you, but the cannot I use the most is: 我还不会.

Because anyone CAN learn anything given enough mastery to LEARN it.

Do you agree?

My name is Anne Beaulieu and I am an emotional Intelligence Coach who assists her clients in believing they have the ability to learn what they need towards mastering their heart’s desire. Accordingly, connect with me at https://walkinginside.com/contact-us

Your EQ Coach,
Anne
www.walkinginside.com

Photo by Randy Fath on Unsplash
[/fusion_text][/fusion_builder_column][/fusion_builder_row][/fusion_builder_container]