Financial Emotional Intelligence lovers …
As business leaders and entrepreneurs, we were trained to equate our years on this planet with emotional maturity.
We were also told that our alpha position automatically makes us
more emotionally intelligent than others in the areas of money and finances.
But what I’ve come to realize is that it is not our titles, accolades, or the amount of money we have in the bank that determines how financially emotionally intelligent we are, it’s the following:
How do you feel about money?
We make decisions emotionally first before justifying them rationally.
For example, think about your most recent financial transaction. Maybe you were buying a coffee, paying a supplier, or paying off an institutional loan.
What were you feeling when that money passed through your hands?
Were you feeling grateful or appreciative when you handed the barista a $5 bill?
What about feeling joyful at meeting a loan repayment deadline?
Many of us were taught to despise money when we pay for something and to like money when we receive it in large chunks.
Be honest with yourself.
When it comes to money, what is your dominant feeling about it?
The reason I am asking is because our ego always validates itself by using our dominant feeling to tap into the pool of beliefs and memories we associate with that dominant feeling.
For most people, the dominant feeling they associate with money is stress.
Stress often comes in the form of anxiety (a fear of the future) or worry (a fear of the past).
According to Debt.Org, “72% of Americans said they felt stressed about money. And 22% said they felt “extreme” stress over their finances.”
Where’s the financial emotional intelligence in that?
Why do you feel that way about money?
This is where it gets juicy for me as the Financial Emotional Intelligence Coach who assists business leaders and entrepreneurs in really zeroing in on what money means to them at the feeling level.
Because I want everyone to thrive emotionally and financially once and for all.
Thinking about your most recent financial transaction, a feeling came up for you. Focus on that feeling. What crossed your mind?
As I said earlier, every time a dominant feeling arises for us around money, we immediately reference it to a belief or memory associated with that dominant feeling. Allow me to explain:
What we do is what we do.
If we said an automatic thank you to the barista who gave us our coffee without genuinely feeling grateful, we may tend to dismiss money the same way,.
Furthermore, if we paid our supplier while feeling angry, we may have focused on the mistakes they made on their last order. In that case, we may turn to a strong feeling of arrogance or contempt around money to prove ourselves right.
If we paid a bank loan installment while feeling anxious, we may have focused on the outstanding balance of that loan. In that case, we may exhibit a strong feeling of non-appreciation around money because there never seems to be enough of the green stuff.
What’s the next step for you to develop your Financial Emotional Intelligence?
Once we feel our naked truth around money (I didn’t say it would be pretty), the next step is to consciously generate more positive feelings around money.
Considering the examples above, this might entail:
- taking the time to genuinely say thank you to the barista while paying for our coffee;
- remembering the last time we laughed with our supplier and piggybacking on that feeling of ease to wish them continued success;
- praising the bank for believing we are worthy of their trust.
Once we acknowledge all our feelings and emotions around money, it becomes much easier to examine all our money beliefs (why we feel that way) with greater honesty.
With that in mind …
Here are three advantages of developing our financial emotional intelligence:
- Deeply understanding that money is in infinite supply and so is feeling … Worldatlas states there is over $90.4 trillion of free money in circulation at any given moment. Wowser! Feel that abundance!
- Breaking down the shackles of conformity. When we stop allowing money to control our thoughts, words, feelings, and actions, we breathe more deeply, and we may see money as a magnificent energy force that we can use to spread joy in our lives and the lives of all the people we care about. Imagine all those trillions of dollars flowing freely through you right now!
- Enjoying meaningful relationships based on mutual respect and gratitude. Being a beacon of positivity attracts people, opportunities, and money to us galore! The most positive people I have ever met have done tremendous inner work on advantages #1 and #2. Speak to your meaning of money gracefully!
And in case you are still wondering if you are too old to embrace financial emotional intelligence, the answer is no! We are never too old to become more emotionally present with money because … the quality of our life depends on it.
If you’re invested in improving your quality of life emotionally and financially, let’s chat. You can book a call with me at https://financialeq.coach/contact-us/